The Evolution of Jona

After 2,5 years in SL Gor i was thinking of my character`s evolution. So i started to search for snapshots i made during the periods of my gorean being and ...tataaaaa....here they are.

My bellymuscles still hurt from laughing but i treasure the old times.


This is my first try as a panther. I was member of a german panther tribe which was not better than an afternoon coffee party for bored housewives. We usually stood at the docks of former "Jasmine", teasing the slaves and displayed our nice sexy outfit with a smexy *Tal Male*...


Ugh....yeah then i transformed into an even more smexy hexy femlaw. Oh my god, i was so proud of my bow and my black leather outfit! I was part of a mercenary group with other hot black leather femlaws. We had bow training twice a week and i wasnt so bad. And of course i used forbidden bows best *grins*.


This is the first step into slavery. Am i not nice? So innocent and white silkish. I started my slave career in good old Teletus as white silk and i stayed white silk cause noone really cared about roleplay there. I had no clue about OOC vs. IC and i wasnt experienced in serving at all. Sadly enough this sim was more a lifestyler place and closed soon due to some OOC quarrels of their owners.


One Master, whose name i wont mention here, took me from Teletus to his place and while waiting for him to log on i made this "fantastic" picture. I was hot, admit it !!! ;-)


Still waiting for him in my f*** awesome hot silks!


My way lead me to the City of Lara, where i was owned by someone else. Guess who of the two hotties is me? Its the blonde one *winks*


Yeah, now we´re talking! My transformation to a bondmaid began here. At Axe Fjord under Huravia´s wings! No bondmaid kirtle yet, but i was close at that time. My third Master who owned me to this time let me experience with outfits i desired, but i always was blonde.


This hair and skin i used a looong time and its still the "typical jona". The picture was made in Skjern (english) where i have been quite a long time. Yeah and i was very fond of body jewellery as you can see *coughs*
Oh, and there were only 2 or 3 places where you could get bondmaid kirtles at that time. Being a bondmaid wasnt popular and noone knew a lot about it. Fortunately I had a very very good trainer who isnt in SL anymore *cries*


For a period of 2 weeks i have been a Free Woman in Ivar´s Landfall. A role that really really doenst fit me. I felt uncomfy and displaced. Its not my roleplay-nature at all.


There was this time when i couldnt see the typical jona-look anymore and pimped my avatar. I got also a new name "emma" but i never really identified with her.


And this is the jona i love to play most. The depressed, chubby, greedy for food-jona who doesnt like to be owned by her Jarl (she thinks he is too cruel), the jona with bad mouth smell and gastro-intestinal problems.

Who knows what comes next? ;-)

Emerald Viewer

Have you heard about this (new) fantastic Emerald Viewer for Second Life? I must admit i am enthusiastic about it. It has so many features i was missing in the common SL-viewer. Some new features are for example the radar-button in the task bar which displays all avatars in the sim with one click. It also shows the viewer people are using. Awesome!

Besides it has more options for builders, more shapes for prims, more detailed direction of objects and a few more cool details.

Another feature is that you can see people`s mouse-movements. Emerald shows a little cross with the name on top, so you can see where the person is currently focussing/camming on. First i was absolutely excited about that. Wow, i thought, how awesome was that? To see who zooms where is going to be interested. As i am curious by nature i was excited to try it out.

First of all i was surprised how many people are using Emerald in Gor already! I said in Gor, cause it seems to be a thing of gorean people...outside of SL Gor you barely see people using Emerald. After my first hype i was plainly perplex. I saw many people using the Emerald viewer, but NOONE...yes i said NOONE....cammed around looking into other avarar`s faces or clothing. Why, i asked myself? People spend hours and lots of dollars pimping their avatars and dont want to look at others?

I can only think of one explanation. Emerald users know about this feature they wanna be so super-duper-cool, like "Hey, i have Emerald and i know you can see my cam-movements, but i am so supercool, i dont NEED to look at you, no..i am not interested at all, all i want is roleplay, and the visual is super-uninteresting for me, ya know?"

Fuck! Why are you in SL then? Go to a HTML-Gor-Chatroom and be cool.

The thing is, that people WITHOUT Emerald are camming around and you can see them looking in people faces and such. Its like people dont wanna get caught or camming is something bad only uncool people do. Umm....

I will keep putting my mouse on avatars and i dont care of someone thinks i am spying or what. I like the visuality of SL, i love pimping avatars and i love to look at pimped avatars.

And YAY for Emerald !

Why do people blog?

Welcome to myself, I joined the club of bloggers. The club of people who have to let other people know about what happens at their work, in their home, with their kitty, what they do and think about others and so on.

If there werent so many people who like to read our virtual brainfarts, would we blog at all?

Well i hesitated a long time considering the pros and cons about blogging but finally i opened this blog. Why did i do that? Isnt it enough to share my thoughts with people who are close to me? And do i have to bother the world with my non-mothertongueish-english? Yes. I must admit its fun to write and it calms me down. Sometimes i can sort my thoughts better whilst writing.

Even if noone reads my germish typed mindset I dont care. Writing is fun to me and i can relax. Yay! I love the world wide web with its endless opportunities!

About bonds, winners, losers and such

I can say from myself that i am a bondmaid. I was no bond when i started SL, nooo nooo. And now I will spare you the whole story of how i came to Torvaldsland and how princessy and awful my way in SL Gor started (believe me, you dont wanna know!) and what kind of newbie mistakes i did, yadayadayada. You probably know from your own experience.

Until i met my latest Jarl in SL i tried always to serve perfect and i had that imagination that the Free would read my serves WORD-BY-WORD. Dam how naive i have been! But i had fun teaching -or better mentoring- other girls who have been new to Torvaldsland and its different ways of be there. I reached a status of a First Girl of a Torvie village and at that period i was proud of it. So i had all kinds of duties but one thing i had not: friends. Some very few from my time before, but as a FG you simply have no friends. Girls are oh-sooo-nice to you but once you turn your back to them they start this.. "oh look, her serves arent that good..yadayada...no idea why she is first girl...whisper...bitch..whisper".

In my further being as a bond we stayed in a village without any ranking girls and ohhh, what a relief! I `ve never had so much fun then there. There was no jealousy about a rank or title, rather about who had the most Jarls in the furs *coughs* and i saw myself slowly relaxing from being perfect all the time.

I started to give my character flaws and little tics. I had so much fun roleplaying the greedy pig who lurks for food everywhere, who farted after she ate something rotten and who was depressed cause no Jarl would touch her cause of her bad mouth smell. Of course she was in a bad position compared to other bonds who roleplayed being nice, well smelling and always in a good condition concerning their gastrointestinal system.

And the more i roleplayed having flaws the more i watched others roleplaying being perfect. When i happily lost in a banter at a Jarl or whatver, other girls were roleplaying as if they lifes depended on winning that quarrel.

Not all girls of course, i just think the more experiences you have the more you dare to risk for your character, the more you can see your character losing or suffering (i dont mean the suffer from a whip). And: the more you enjoy not being perfect all the time!

I mean hey, every avatar in SL is just perfect! No pimples, no dry skin, no fat tummy spicked with dark hairs, full hair, of course no bald head...yeah we dont want all in SL, its enough to fight those things in RL, you say. But being able to let your character lose or being topped by someone isnt usually something you`d like to do every day.

So if you wanna say so, yes my character is a loser. Through and through.

To write about dudes who arent able to lose in battles is another topic and i dont wanna write about that now. I`d like to have a low blood pressure.

Ants in the pants

I love cleaning. Not so much the action itself but to see that a thing or furniture/floor got actually clean afterwards gives me highest satisfaction. The matter is that dirt makes me restless. Once i have focussed on a dirty spot i wont rest until it is removed, even when i just made myself cozy on the sofa and logged into SL, maybe planning to build something new or go and have a nice roleplay adventure.

No! This frigging dirt spot catches my eye again and again, its like hypnotizing me: "look at me, look at me, i am HERE...and i am DIRTY..." it says again and again until i finally stand up, take a cloth and remove it. Its getting worse when i maybe thought a few hours before to tidy out my closet. Even when i know i have time to do it and it hasnt to be done the next day or week, i cannot relax. Once i have an idea of cleaning or sorting anything i really have ants in the pants!

Last week i told my boyfriend after i have cleaned my whole appartement " Dam, its so clean and nice here, its better than having an orgasm!" He laughed about it but i have this vague idea that it scratched his manhood in some way.

Also in SL i watch myself doing similiar things. Well its not dirty in SL until you put a dirt texture in something but we have this little building skybox. And guess what? I hate hate hate when things stand around, forgotten, maybe started to build on and never finished. I cannot concentrate when things around me arent in an order. I know my boyfriend would say now: "Ordnung muss sein" (There must be order!)! Oh and i love love love the delete button. It gives me this huge satisfaction as if i had cleaned my appartement with tons of good smlling cleaning foam...RRRrrrrrrrrr!!!

I would not wonder if my boyfriend gave me a cleaning rag and some kinky duster coat next time we are getting intimate. . .

Culture Shock

When you live in your own little world, your country, you take things for granted. Your envirnoment is well aquainted and people around you speak the same language and regard the same social norms.

Its not that i havent been in another country, no i traveled a lot in my life. Asia, Afrika, USA and parts of southern Europe have been blessed with my presence. When you are in holiday you kinda expect things are different, yes you hope it though as you want to escape your little world for a limited time. So, nothing to be scared about.

Usually nothing can shock me, or almost nothing. But hey, yes i am shocked. I start to doubt about the trueness of the society i am living in. I was so convinced that this is the way we should live here (in my country) but everything changed since i had an insight into my neighbourcountry.

I expected almost everything like i was used to it, after all these two countries have a common history and such. But what do i know? Now that i have been visited my boyfriend a few times and after some morehundred hours of talks, i am having a culture shock. I would have never believed things can be so different and so much easier in some ways than i was used to be.

The stiff and rigid way things have become here are something our neighbours laugh about. Havent we developed so quick as they have or are we just a generation of nitpickers?

I am thankful to be able to make these experiences, but also cause i found out that many things here are just more awesome! Yeah!

Diplomacy

Diplomacy isnt my strong point. I am rather direct and blunt, speak out my mind in a way my partner of conversation knows excactly how the wind blows. Close friends and parts of my family are aware about that but i really have a hard time to get into my diplomacy-mode all of a sudden.

But when i am at work i catch myself switching to "diplomacy" as soon as i open my office and breath the mouldy scent of aged documents. It is like the fragance turns off my "oh-i-need-to-tell-you-what-an-asshole-you-are"-mood and turns me into a tamed little kitten. Now dont think being non-diplomatic means to be unfriendly but hey, there are people out there i dont like. Arent they supposed to know about that? No, you say. Yes i know.

So, whenever the very undiplomatic feeling ovverrules my body I start to inhale very deeply and think of mustry papers and documents and put a smile on my face.

I think i can be diplomatic and also speak out my mind. Its very important for me to let my counterpart know, at least i am authentic and just me. Superficial relationships are not for me anyway.